Irish Time

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September 17, 2013 by Syd

According to irish people time is more relative than poor Einstein ever could imagine. The taxi that will be there in a minute must have an interspace jump with 30 other customers inbetween me calling the taxi company and the 30 min stretch of said minute. I also assume, that only I have mistaken the “I call you in five” as in “five minutes” of course it must be hours.

For example yesterday: While I was standing there with my heavy shopping bags in the rain waiting for the taxi, which was supposed to be “around the corner” after I had called in 20 min after my first call I started to count all the streetcorners I know in this city said Taxi driver must “be around”. It took him another irish five to show up (German time: 23 min 12 sec) and I was about to kill him with my pack of celeries.

Of all the things I can adapt to, all the crazy little things I began to love about my new home I will never ever get used to said Irish time. I can understand something like “eightish” which obviously means you are perfectly on time when you start to get showered at eight. You might still be the first on time. I do accept that my understanding of eightish is too German. Usually I would be there at five to eight, but hey relax I can understand and cope and just say nineish is my eightish.

But “I call you in 5” means I call you back asap, not in three days. “I will be at your place at eight” means I am the one who will be  ready and will be waiting for you with a cooked dinner, whine and all and expect you to be there at eight. Not nine, not ten, not whenever you please. In my strange german head this is rude and I expect you to be on time, when you say eight. Or to translate it EIGHT SHARP! My time is also worth something and waiting for you is taking away my time, my sanity and my good dinner. If you do NOT know if you can make it on time, send me an SMS not an hour later, saying you will be there in five minutes, sundowns, nights, mornings, seconds whatever when you are still around my corner getting showered.

Sincerely I love you people but wasting my time will always make me haywire, angry with you and all that for no reason at all. Just use the correct hour, we can talk about an academic quarter of an hour as acceptable time of being late or one day I simply might stop waiting and be gone by the time you show up. That’s what rude German people do.

Love, Syd

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